When you’re committed to playing big and living that dream of yours, sacrifice is always a slice of the pie you can’t avoid. In fact, dream or no dream, we make sacrifices on a daily basis. It’s just that when passion and purpose collide and you’ve devoted yourself to truly experiencing the whole damn crazy ride, sacrifice can feel a little heavy at times.
Perhaps you're sacrificing a well paying job, for a passion that lights you up… Sacrificing your Saturday nights, to write the online workshop that needs to be birthed… Or sacrificing the small weekend getaways now, so you can soon travel around the country with more financial security.
Want a behind the scenes peak into my life? Well, all of the sacrifices above.. their mine. They are my present reality and I'm sure they're quite similar to your own. I might find peace and presence in being the one who lifts you up, empowers you and help you take charge of your life. But that does not mean I am without sacrifice. In fact, to sacrifice and surrender has become a rather welcome part of my life (on my good days anyway!).
Whatever the goal you are trying to achieve in your own life, I'm sure it’s big business and it’s likely you’re prepared to make some pretty big life changes to make it happen. Yet despite always keeping in mind WHY you’ve made the sacrifices you’ve made, they can still pull you into a deep state of despair. You begin to question your reasoning and doubt your choices, distancing yourself from the commitment and gutsy determination that led you to make these sacrifices in the first place. And let’s face it, it can send you on a downward spiral of comparison, judgment and a whole lot of FOMO.
But here’s the thing..
With every sacrifice, we are exercising our power to choose. We are owning our decisions, charging forward with self-responsibility and claiming back our power.
Yet why do we often find ourselves wanting to take the easy way out?
We spend so much time desiring empowerment, claiming how we’re going to make this life ours, seize the day and show this world who's boss. But then when the reality of a sacrifice hits home, and we are forced to exercise the very gift we fight for, we want nothing more than to step down from our podium, hand back the reigns and and sink back into the passenger seat of our lives.
So why do we do it? Why do we allow ourselves to be sucked under by the sacrifices we have made and let them strip us of the empowerment we crave so bad?
Because we have decided that there is simply no value in sacrifice. We have ultimately decided that to sacrifice is to lose.
We have decided that to sacrifice is to miss out or to be in a state of lack. When really it is simply our conscious mind exercising his or her own power to choose whilst practising the art of surrender. To gain anything in this life, we must be able to make space for it by letting something go. We must be willing to release in order to attract, but in a society where we seek instant gratification and praise the outcome more than the process, the art of letting go, surrender and sacrifice is often overlooked, despite it being one of the most enlivening experiences we can feel.
To surrender and let go of something, in order to help grow another part of your life can be absolute FREEDOM. It can evoke potent CLARITY on what really needs your attention, and it can flood your life with an incredible amount of EASE. It can open you up to receiving the very thing your dream needs to be born, and it’s usually the fastest way to actually bring that dream of yours to life.
Resisting surrender in any part of your life is an uphill battle that you just don't need to have, and can keep you 'fighting' something you have never even met. This 'fight' keeps you caught up in your masculine energy, quietens any intuitive messages that are trying to come through, and prevents you from strengthening your trust and faith. This 'fight' that so many of us fiercely independant and driven dreamers have, is something I am going to be diving deep into during my upcoming online workshop, helping women finally feel safe, free and empowered enough to let go when it's needed and remember what it means to soften into life with more ease. Because when we finally give ourselves permission to be supported in a life where we don't always have to have it all figured out or have complete control over how our dream is coming to life, THAT is when the universe really does deliver the magic and show you that the plan it had for you all along was wilder than your wildest dreams.
Can't wait for the workshop? Ready to start spicing up your relationship to sacrifice and surrender right now? Here's 5 practical take-home tips for you to take on board right now to help you make sacrifices that feel abundant:
- Chances are, you’re totally getting caught up in everything you’re NOT doing, instead of everything you ARE doing. Time to sprinkle some gratitude on this situation. Identify an area of your life where you’ve had to make a sacrifice. Now make a list of all the things you are now able to do, that you wouldn’t be able to if you hadn’t made this sacrifice. What have you GAINED? What has this experience of sacrifice and surrender GIFTED YOU? Get detailed, get honest and get emotional - what FEELINGS are at play here? What are you able to feel now, or alternatively, no longer have to feel now? How is this experience of ‘letting go’ helping you to be a better version of you? How is your experience of life growing and changing? Find the value in your sacrifice and milk it for all its worth!
- Words are important, as are their meaning and significance. So, if ‘sacrifice’ sounds like a dirty word to you, then ditch it. Maybe you might like to use the word ‘choices’, ‘surrender’ or refer to the act as something you’re taking a ‘retreat from’. Whatever works for you in reminding you that this isn’t do or die, and it sure as hell isn’t the way it is going to be forever. (Side note: This works for a lot of things and is easily applied to all the things we generally shy away from. 'Exercise' can be 'movement', 'diet' can be 'nourishment', meetings can be 'play dates' etc.)
- Make the process super SIMPLE by getting your values in order and listing your priorities in black and white. Keep your eye on the prize by keeping them in your diary, wallet or on a post-it on your computer. Bonus points for including your WHY here too. It’s easier to stay positive and keep your head up, when you know why you are doing it. My 'why'? "So I can love people more..” I work, I look after myself, I say yes, I say no, I surrender, I make sacrifices - all in the name of being able to love and connect with people just that little bit more. Because love and connection are two of my highest values, and my life is nothing without them. I know I am feeling my best when I am surrounded by love; not by money, success, things or even tropical destinations. Yes, all of that stuff adds to the fun, but it does nothing for me if I am not consciously plugged in to the love that comes from human interactions. So connecting my 'why' to be highest values means I am always prepared to do what it takes to fulfill that 'why'.
- Befriend the process, and not just your own. Take some time to look at those who you admire and who are already living parts of your dream. Look into their own processes, stories and journeys and soak it up. Often we just need a reminder that everyone else also has a behind the scenes life and deals with the same sacrifices that we do. Give the process some credit by acknowledging it’s presence in the lives of those you admire. And use that as inspiration to acknowledge your own. One day you’ll look back and thank the heavens for this experience - why not live it in it’s entirety?
- Suck it up. Sorry to be blunt (actually, so not sorry...), but chances are your dream is worth it. Pull your head in and keep hustling. You know it’s in you. And you know that having to sacrifice and surrender to this process is going to make for an even more delicious and richer experience. We were put on this planet to grow, learn, evolve and experience. And none of that comes from taking the easy road. Rest assured, you're not the only one making sacrifices so be sure to vent your frustrations with mates when they arise, and then continue the hustle with a hell of a lot of heart!
I want to know... What are you currently sacrificing to bring your dream life into the real world? What are you giving up right now in order to be the best version of you? Let's unite in sharing our stories, in an attempt to lighten the load for those who may feel like they are currently drowning in self-pity and just can't see the light. Share with me what you are currently sacrificing and let's get a conversation happening!
As always, thank you for being here and showing up for yourself. If you have a friend that needs to hear this or you simply enjoyed the read, I'd be so grateful if you shared it using the buttons below.